What’s a Girl to Do about Saggy Boobs, Like Real Saggy?

Gravity is a jerk. It contributes to those fine lines and wrinkles you’ve started noticing, the extra pounds quarantine gave you and — worst of all — the sag in your boobs.

Yes, dear, it’s true; the ta-tas aren’t as perky as they once were.

OK, full transparency, it’s not just gravity at work. From poor support while letting the girls bounce to pregnancy, breastfeeding and changes in weight, there is a lot that can lead to sagginess up top.

And, hey, a little sag isn’t the end of the world. Even celebs are rocking the “not perfectly perky” look these days. But when the nips start pointing south and the situation starts looking more like a baseball in a tube sock? At that point, it isn’t even about looks; you probably struggle with everything from going braless at home to finding support that lifts without wrinkling the cleavage.

So, What’s a Girl to Do?

If your droopy girls have been bothering you for any amount of time, you have likely hit Google to find out how to stop boob sag. And in the results, you’ve no doubt found a wide range of “solutions.”

Oils that will supposedly tighten those babies right back up
Machines that massage the chest and stimulate blood flow
The 1950s “I Must Increase My Bust” exercises
Tens machines to make the pectoral muscles twitch to supposedly build strength

Home remedies for breast sag range from the logical to the downright weird.

Listen, there is a whole lot of crazy out there.

To be fair, some of these solutions might make a small difference. Building the pectoral muscles — through exercise, please, not a tens machine — can create a slight lifting effect. But overwhelmingly, they either won’t create any change, or the change will be minimal.

Does That Mean It’s Sag City for the Rest of Your Days?

No, ma’am. In addition to the so-called solutions that don’t work or barely work, there are actual solutions that will give you the boost you want.

Cosmetic surgery is a big step, but if breast sagginess is bothering you, it’s also the only solution that will offer noticeable and lasting results. Breast lifts are designed to take what you have and get it into the ideal position. And keep in mind, you could be someone who has always had sagging breasts and still be able to reshape them through surgery.

If One Procedure Is Good, Will Two Be Better?

Sometimes, breasts sag because of a loss of volume. In these situations, you can choose to replace that volume during your surgery by getting a breast lift with implants.

This is a great way to get two procedures without paying for everything twice. It ensures your breasts sit higher on your chest while also having the volume to create great cleavage. Of course, if volume isn’t a concern, you are fine sticking with a lift alone.

Couldn’t You Just Get Implants?

Nope! Implants add volume and weight — they don’t address sagging at all. While the logic of filling in the sagging skin makes sense, ultimately, if you put volume in there without tightening the skin, the sagging will look more profound than it did before. So if you want a real, long-term fix, it’s either a lift or a lift with implants.