Boob Jobs

4 Tricks to Keeping Your New Boobs on the Down Low

New Boobs

New BoobsSo, you want to have breast augmentation but don’t know how to keep a boob job private. Don’t worry, we’ve got your back. Follow these tips to help you become a boob job ninja.

  1. Time it Right

    Winter and spring are the perfect time for savvy ladies like you to schedule their breast augmentation. You can literally keep your new boobs under wraps with cool weather clothes, giving you time to recover and for your implants to drop and fluff before bikini season.

  2. Take Extra Time Off

    Take plenty of time off work, so you don’t have to return while you’re still in the more obvious phase of your recovery. You don’t have to tell anyone why you’re taking time off but you could always say something like, “two of my cats got married and I’m taking them on a honeymoon.” They probably won’t keep bothering you after that.

    Your new boobies are nobody’s business but your own.

  3. Recruit Help

    Stay out of the spotlight during the first couple of weeks. If you have obligations, get someone to fill in for you while you recuperate. Unless you have jury duty. If you do, we’re sorry, but you have to go. Judges tend not to respect the sanctity of boob jobs.

  4. Don’t Go Overboard

    If you go from an A cup to looking like Dolly Parton overnight, people are going to suspect something. While it can be tempting to go big, think about the last time you went to that buffet restaurant. Sure, it sounded like a good idea to eat the entire dessert display but you regretted it later. Or, maybe that was us. The point is this: if you don’t want people knowing you have fake boobs, don’t get fake-looking boobs.

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